DidhethinkthatMalfoywasgoingtogetoutofAzkabanokayandtheyangothroughtheireighthyearinpeaeandeverything’sgoingtobealrightandeveryone’sgoingtofinallybehappy?
Ormaybe,maybehe’sryingbeauseofeverythinghehadn’tbeenabletoprevent.
Remus.Tonks.Fred.Snape.Dumbledore.Cedri.Sirius.God,Sirius.
AndnowDraoMalfoylosinghismindinAzkaban.
Heshouldhavebeenabletopreventatleastthat,right?
Thewar’sover.Whyarethosearoundhimstillsuffering?
Maybehe’stired.
He’stiredtryingtoavoidthepress,tryingtoavoidtheMinistry,tryingtoavoidtheBurrowandtheWeasleys’insistenethathe’sfamilynow,eventhoughhe’snot,notreally,andhefeelslikeanintrudertotheirgriefwhentheyseehimandhavetopretendthatthey’renotmason,abrother.
He’stryingtoavoidhimselfmostofall,beausehe’sspentnightsaloneinGrimmauldPeandthosenightswerelongnights,strethingimpossiblyfurther,asdarkasaforest(darkasdeath),asquietastheafterlife(likewhitenoise)(theafterlife’snotthatpeaefulafterall),witheahtikofthelokehoingthroughthewallsandountingallthepeoplethathelost.
ButseeingDraoMalfoylikethatremindshim,foreshimtoseethatavoidingtheproblemdoesn’treallyfixit,kindofmakesitbiggerandmoredaunting,andthatyes,thewar’sover,butthatdoesn’tmeanthateverything’sokay.
Everyone’sstillsufferingandhe’sstillsufferingandmaybehe’snotyetdonelosingpeopleafterall.
Hemanagestogethimselfoffthefloorandtowardsthefirepeinthemasterroom,takingthelibertytoFloohimselfbaktoGrimmauldPe.
Thenightisstilllonganditisstilldarkandthehouseisstillquiet,unbearablyso,sohelokshimselfinhisroomanddoesn’temergeuntilRon’sknokingonhisdoortheday.
Agneattheloktellshimit’spastlunhtime.
Duringthenight,exhaustedandeyesswollenafterryingsomuh,hehadsomehowfallenasleep,andforthis,heisgrateful.Hedoesn’tknowhowheouldhavesurvivedthatwholenightawake.
“Harry,”omesRon’svoiefromtheothersideofthedoor,andit’ssoftandareful,andHarryknowsatonethatRonknowssomething.
“I’mup,”Harrysays,voieraking.Heswallowsthedrynessdownhisthroat,andthentriesagain.“I’mup.”
“Mumsentyoufood.Haveyoueatenyet?”
Hehasaheadahe,butheforeshimselfoutofbedanyway.Hethinkshelooksawful,hisfaefeelsstiky,butthere’snopointhidingit.NotfromRon,anyway.
Andhe’stootiredtoevensummontheenergytolookforhiswand.
Heopensthedoor,letsRonsee.